"Just Because"
2007 Pokey Records
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My Mom's Refrigerator

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words and music by Kim Townsend
© 2004(ASCAP)

My Mom's a real sweet lady, she's loved by EVERYONE she knows
She's got a heart as big as Texas, and you'd swear that it's made of gold
But my mom has got a dark side, and a secret that she guards with care
it concerns a certain appliance and the things she has stashed in there...

Inside my Mom's refrigerator where it's a mystery as to what you'll find
there in the cold, dark, and damp, wrapped in foil and Saran
is the Twilight Zone of meals gone by

There in my Mom's refrigerator where crops of mold are growing wild
a penicillin incubator, antibiotic generator
a new eco-system's starting to thrive

You'll find liquids that have changed to solids
and solids that have turned to goop
and if you care to take a dare and aren't easily scared,
check out the salad that has turned to soup

There's something awfully smelly near the dressings and the jellies
could be old meatloaf or some leathery cheese
it would take a Haz-Mat crew to identify the goo...
but the task would bring 'em to their knees

Inside my Mom's refrigerator is half a sandwich that could use a shave
some inedible macaroni, a hunk of dried bologna, crusty pudding made in '78
It's kinda creepy in my Mom's refrigerator former meals lie in Tupperware tombs
entire herds of fuzzy bagels are trying to finagle a spot next to some bearded fruit

And where would we be without the twenty-three
varieties of salsas and jams
sequestered in my Mom's refrigerator
on the shelf above the slimy, green ham

And just because it's handy, Mom saves a lot of candy
from holidays and seasons gone by
She should charge folks to see 'em in her chocolate museum
of Santas, rabbits, Valentines

The irony of my Mom's refrigerator is: the food that she is trying to save
gets the cold, "kiss-of-death" from her GE Frost-free
never again to see the light of day

Jimmy Hoffa was last seen stooping to find himself a tasty snack
inside my Mom's refrigerator and come to think of it... he's never been back!